How to make working from home structured and enjoyable (without having to give up on “me” & family time)
Being a (fairly new) working mum has been one of my biggest challenges so far. When my son turned one year old I decided not to go back to my previous employee life and fully focus on my own businesses: heiter magazine and my consulting agency (for small fashion and lifestyle brands). There were lots of ups and downs at the beginning. The childminder we initially picked to look after J turned out to be unreliable and I often ended up having him at home whilst trying to reply to emails and social media comments. It didn’t feel great, especially because I hated the thought of him seeing me in front of a screen all the time. He was still quite little at that point and it was pretty much impossible to do any housework next to him either, let alone doing something for myself. I used every nap time to work and catch up on doing the dishes, washing etc. and I often ended up continuing with it all once he was up. I felt so guilty. First of all, for not being present when I spent time with him. Second of all, because I was constantly stressed and nothing seemed to get done properly. Luckily, things started to shift about 6 months in. I managed to do some mindset work and accept that being imperfect is ok. Furthermore, my husband and I managed to find a daycare spot for J and after a few weeks of adjusting, he started to love going there. I also created a routine for myself during the daycare hours and that now helps me to be laser-focused, productive and most importantly, present once my husband and son are back home. I’d like to share that routine with you today and hope that you’ll find it useful.
My routine: 10 points that help me to maintain a work-life balance
1) As soon as my boys leave for work & daycare in the morning, I tidy up the breakfast stuff/kitchen and then give myself a few minutes for a self-love meditation and a bit of gentle yoga. That way I won’t forget to look after myself.
2) I make an effort and get ready for work as soon as I am done with point 1. I treat the day as a “normal work day”, even though I work from home. I shower, brush my teeth, get dressed and put make-up on. Doing that sets the mood and I have the right mindset to work through my to-do list.
3) I have fixed working hours as well as themed working days (see below for more info) and I stick to them. Outside my working hours I have out of office replies on so that I have no need to feel guilty for not replying to emails on afternoons and weekends.
4) I put my phone to the side so that I cannot get distracted by social media or text messages. It’s on loud though, in case there are important calls.
5) If I get texts or calls that are not important, I have a little text template prepared so that I can tell people that I am not available but can get back to them afterwards.
6) I write a to-do list each week and prioritise each individual task that is on there. The most important tasks, priority 1 ones, are the ones I work through first. 2s and 3s can be potentially be moved to the next day or later in the week in case I run out of time. I am very understanding with myself here: I don’t beat myself up for not getting everything in one go (like I used to do when working in a competitive and overly productive cooperate workplace). It makes such a big difference.
7) I don’t compromise anymore. I used to plan around other people and often ended up accepting calls and online meetings on evenings. My husband (who had just come home from work) then had to look after my son. I felt guilty and my husband was frustrated. It wasn’t great for our relationship and family life, and that is why I now only plan in work stuff during my working hours.
8) I purposely put all my work things away before I pick up my son from daycare. That way I don’t get tempted to open up my laptop again.
9) I plan our meals one week in advance (together with my husband) which makes going shopping easier and I don’t have to worry about what to cook during work or family time. All the ingredients are already in my cupboard & fridge and I don’t spend a lot of time guessing. On a side note, I love cooking and it’s part of my heiter activities. It usually helps me to relax and wind down, and that is why I look forward to it (most of the time). Knowing that I do something heiter and not just a chore, has really helped with my energy levels and mood.
10) I only post on social media in the evening. J is in bed by then and my hubby watches a programme he likes. I used to post in the morning and yes, I had more engagement on my individual posts but doing that often resulted in social media eating up the the majority of my working time (even though, there’s more to my business than social media). Now I have better boundaries in place and posting doesn’t clash with our family time anymore either.
My themed working days:
Monday: my Mondays are not as strict as my other working days. I work for about 2-3 hours (usually on content creation) in the morning and then leave room for meeting friends, self-care or other feel-good activities.
Tuesday: my consulting day with 1o1 calls, workshops and if time allows, a few external projects
Wednesday: my day for all sorts of heiter admin. I might also do some content planning that day, schedule FB posts and upload new Pinterest pins.
Thursday: the day for all other heiter things such as heiter people chats, writing, image sourcing, collaborations, contributor calls but also a bit of personal development
Friday: a non-working day that I spend with my son. Now & then I have a call with my business coach in the evening. She is based in the US and my husband and I have an agreement that he looks after J during those calls.
My biggest learnings from being a working mum:
- It is ok to ask for help. Now, that we have J at daycare (rather than just with a childminder), we see so many positives in him going there. He spends time with other kids and is exposed to all sorts of creative and educational activities which he really enjoys. It also allows me to be the mum my son deserves: a mum that has a better work-life balance. A mum that is happier and much more relaxed :).
- It is important to be kind to and plan in “feel-good” activities for myself. That way I can fully function, be productive during work and enjoy my family life.
- It is ok to be imperfect. I run my business my way. I set boundaries and if I have to move my tasks to other days/times that is perfectly fine too.
- It is ok to set boundaries and work in a way that is best for myself and my family.
I would love to hear what your thoughts are, and what has helped you to navigate your personal journey as a working mum.
Love and be heiter,
Katharina x
Words: Katharina Geissler-Evans
Image: To be told Photography
