What do you think? Is home a house, a feeling, a place where you once lived, a place where you’ve never lived, perhaps even a community?

Also, how do you know when you are home?

In April this year I moved back to the UK after living in Thailand for almost 8 years.

When I told people I was returning, they would always reference the UK as my home.

“You’re going back home”.

But I didn’t feel like I was going back home.

I was moving to a town that was new to me, in an area I hadn’t lived in for over 20 years but most importantly, I wasn’t the same person I was 8 years ago when I left the UK.

How could I say I was going back home when I didn’t feel like it was my home that I was going to?

People often think that when you return to your home country after living abroad, you just slot right back in, but I didn’t feel that way.

Living abroad changes you.

You change how you act, speak, what you eat, your daily routines and your relationships.

You live life differently.

When I arrived in the UK I didn’t want to just slot right back in. And what was I really slotting back into?

Friendships I had before I left the UK had shifted, understandably. As we all walk new paths and realise that some friends are in our lives for a season. And that’s ok.

The places I used to go to before, felt different, because I was different.

I worked in a different industry and had very different values.

I didn’t slot back into any of my previous UK life. This was a new chapter.

So 3 months in, does the UK feel like home again? I’m pleased to say, yes, it does.

What I quickly realised was that home isn’t a physical place to me, it’s the feeling of being home that helps me call a place home.

So what does this feeling actually feel like?

It’s the joy in your surroundings.

It’s the familiar smells and sounds.

It’s the same faces, a community.

It’s noticing the small things that you only really notice after the tenth time.

It’s the routines and the barista who knows your coffee order.

For me a routine has been a vital part of the ‘feeling of being home’. I am lucky to live one road away from the coast and enjoy walks along the beach almost everyday - something I did every morning in Thailand. I regularly go to a Crossfit gym not just for fitness but for the community. I journal daily, explore local cafes and enjoy the sunshine as much as I can.

This all helps me to create the feeling of being home.

But there’s been one anchor statement that has helped me in times of doubt and missing (my Thailand) home: Trust in the process.

You can’t ever be certain how you’ll feel coming home. Even if it’s returning to a house you lived in for 25 years, a new city that you’ve researched endlessly and you're confident it’s your vibe or a place that just sounds exciting.

What we can be certain of is trusting in the process that it’s possible to create the feeling of being home.

It may take one year, one month or maybe just one day, but you’ll get there and if you ever feel like you’ve lost that feeling I’ll leave you with one thought…

Home really is where your heart is, and that is right here, in this moment.

Kat Amey is a Life Coach who helps people ditch conventional ideas of success and create a life that feels uniquely purposeful. Through understanding their values, she helps her clients figure out what success really means to them and then take steps to make it happen. Kat also hosts wellbeing workshops and retreats in the UK.

Main image by Ellie Letch, coffee image by Anna Considine from Studio Gently.

Did you enjoy this piece on finding home? Then you might also like our current “Homecoming Issue” (heiter print issue 2). You can find it here.

During this crazy year where we all were forced to slow down, where plans were impossible to make and we had more free time than ever, many of us turned to the same pastime. Cooking.

Watching people discover their inner Julia Child, embracing their mistakes, getting inventive when ingredients were hard to come by and making an effort to minimise food waste was a beautiful thing. Food has always been a central part of my life. My entire family loves to cook and eat. So when I meet others that are cut from the same cloth, I can’t help but feel an affinity to those people.

In October I was invited to the small holding and event space, Mello View on the border of Somerset and Dorset. I’ve known Vicky and Ed, the owners of this food oasis, for just over a year. They needed new photography of their recently completed barn and I was more than happy to photograph it for them, giving me a legitimate excuse to trade the bustling streets of London for the muddy country roads of Somerset.

Like me, Vicky and Ed had once lived in London. In 2014 however they decided to leave the city so that they could start their dream of living off the land, growing and rearing what they ate as well as cooking and entertaining for others. They eventually found a 1950’s cowshed with an unobstructed view of Axe Valley. Ed began building their dream home, which has all been documented by the Channel 4 series Grand Designs. Several years later, they’re now married with two beautiful boys, a few cows, pigs, chickens, ducks and hens. They’ve created a beautiful little pocket of greenery with a farm garden that would be an endless source of inspiration for any chef or home cook.

It was a sunny day but the Autumn air was crisp and by the end of the shoot we were all ready for something warming. Ed, who had an effortlessness way about him in the kitchen, that only a practiced chef would have, began to make us lunch. As we chatted, he chopped, sautéed and stirred the ingredients together. I had no idea what he was cooking up but I’d learned over time that whatever it was, it would be delicious.

When the stew was finally done we were more than ready to dig in. Hearty, flavourful and entirely delicious it has now become a staple in my home. Though I only tried for the first time this October, I’ve already recreated this stew three times. It’s important to note that this recipe is quite simple. What makes it magic is the quality of the ingredients. Ed had reared the pig himself, the chicken stock he’d also made the day before and all the vegetables were grown on his property. The chickpeas I’ve learned were these from Brindisa. Though I’m not asking you to rear your own pig or buy these specific chickpeas, just make sure that you’re buying something good. It’ll be worth it!

Feel free to adjust the quantities to your personal liking. It’s quite an easy stew to adapt. This recipe is for a stew as there isn’t much liquid, but if you’d prefer it to be a soup simply add more stock and/or water as you see fit.

You can follow Vicky and Ed’s story here.

Mello View Stew Recipe

Ingredients

700g jar of Chickpeas (best if in a glass jarred, not tin)

500g Chicken broth, can add more if you’d like the stew a bit more soupy

2 Parsnips, cut in quarters lengthwise

3 Carrots, sliced

2 leeks, sliced into thin rounds

3 garlic cloves, roughly chopped

150g Bacon lardon, cubed

1 cup of water

Instructions

Fry the bacon on a medium heat in a dutch oven until it begins to brown. Once browned, remove with a slotted spoon, leaving the fat in the pot.
Toss the carrots into the pot with the bacon fat and sauté until softened.
Next add the leeks. Once softened, add the garlic. Season with pepper.
Add the bacon back in along with the parsnips and chicken broth and a cup of water. Let it simmer for an hour, add water if it starts to dry up.
Ten minutes before you serve, add the chickpeas to the stew. When it’s at a consistency that you like, serve.

Words & images: Ariana Ruth

Ariana Ruth is the Editor-in-Chief of Table Magazine, a bi-annual publication sharing food stories and the people that make up the food community.

Home - what does that actually mean?

Mello View and their special stew recipe

Mello View Stew Recipe